step 1 reflections

It's been a crazy two months, but a two months where God made himself known every single day. Most of what he has done I don't deserve considering how negative I was through most of it, but I guess that's why they call it grace. When I look back, all the days blur together along with the moments I felt weakest and unable to move forward. But through it there were always glimpses of hope, like light piercing into darkness, that propelled me to keep at what I was doing and not forsake my God. There were some key lessons I took away that I hope will remember and be able to apply in the future.

1. Jehovah Jireh, the Lord will provide - there were many days where failure led to discouragement which led to doubt and every time my thoughts were led astray to doubt God's character I remember how God kept his promise to Israel:

Thus the LORD gave to Israel all the land that he swore to give to their fathers. And they took possession of it, and they settled there. And the LORD gave them rest on every side just as he had sworn to their fathers. Not one of all their enemies had withstood them, for the LORD had given all their enemies into their hands. Not one word of all the good promises that the LORD had made to the house of Israel had failed; all came to pass. (Joshua 21:43-45)

2. Prayer is power - one day that stands out to me was the moment where it was the hardest to keep going and I had a panic attack, but that same day a friend emailed me and encouraged me with prayer and scripture. The following days were much of the same and those emails were so dear to me. They spoke truth and love just when I needed them and the prayers of many helped carry me through to the end

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ. (Philippians 4:6-7)

3. Ultimate glory awaits those to put faith in Christ Jesus - no matter what happened each day or even when I find out my score, whether it is a joy or a sorrow, I will still rejoice and not lose faith that my salvation is assured.

So we do not lose heart. Though our other self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4: 16-18)